All the Things

As I look back on the whirlwind of the past few months, the holiday season wraps around me like a warm blanket, reminding me of all the things I’m grateful for. I cherish my family and friends, the fulfilling work I get to do, and the chance to be a bright spot in the lives of our students, the people and the incredible teams we work with.  

It was a crisp December morning when I was walking back from dropping off my son at Pre-K. Usually, my mind buzzes with a to-do list: tackling presentations, prepping for meetings, fulfilling my volunteer commitments, and decorating my own home. I often find myself pondering whether I’ve picked out the perfect gifts, if anyone’s been overlooked, or if I’ve remembered to catch up with my friend. Oh, and did I sign my son up for that thing he loves? Remember to drink water today, pick up stamps, make that appointment you’ve been putting off.  The list was going on and on in my mind and I could feel the weight of the pressure I put on myself.  

This all faded for a moment as I came face to face with a familiar acquaintance. It was a woman I knew, her smile warm and genuine. “Katie, how are you?” she asked, a spark of concern in her eyes.

I paused, taking a deep breath that felt heavier than usual. “I’m good, thank you… just doing all the things,” I replied, really trying to convince myself.  She smiled knowingly; as a mom of three, she gets it.  

Her brow furrowed slightly, and she leaned in. “But how are you really? Are you taking care of yourself?”

Her thoughtful and unexpected question hung in the air, a gentle reminder amidst all the things.  In that moment, I realized that sometimes, the most important thing we can do is check in with ourselves and give ourselves a reset.  

The importance of resetting is something that’s really, really hard to find and then actually make the time for.  However, a reset is crucial for mental, emotional, and physical well-being. When life is filled with constant demands, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. 

Research consistently shows that without regular breaks, burnout is inevitable.

For example, a 2021 study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that taking regular breaks throughout the day can improve cognitive function and reduce stress levels. This is even more important for women, who often tend to take on a disproportionate amount of emotional and domestic labor. 

When people don’t have time or make time to reset, it can impact their mental health, leading to anxiety, depression, and physical ailments. Resetting is vital because it helps replenish energy, refocus the mind, and build resilience to manage the ongoing demands that never seem to stop.

A study in The Journal of Applied Psychology highlighted that workers who take regular time for self-care are more effective in their roles and have better job satisfaction.

In short, carving out time for yourself isn’t just a luxury; it’s a necessity for long-term well-being.

I mean… we KNOW what we’re supposed to do.  It’s easier said than done.  Finding time to reset is already a challenging task, made even more difficult by any invisible labor in your life.  Invisible labor is often hard to see in others because it’s not always something tangible like completing a project at work. It’s the accumulation of small, ongoing tasks that keep everything in motion but are easily overlooked or taken for granted. The emotional and mental toll that comes with it can be heavy, especially for those who bear the brunt of this labor without the recognition it deserves. Or as I like to call it… All the Things.  

How do I reset?

Sure, you can do all the things it tells you we should be doing like deep breathing, meditation, journaling, yoga.  All the things we know we are supposed to do but probably won’t.  If you can, and do, I love that for you.  If you could use some ways to reset… start with one of these.  

Set boundaries by not feeling like you need to say yes to everyone and everything all the time.  Encourage others to own what they want to see happen.   You are not able to and do not need to carry the whole world on your shoulders by yourself.   

Be brave enough to ask for help– have the courage to delegate and be then also be okay that it definitely won’t be exactly like you would do it. 

Move, rest and sleep.  Park farther away.  Take the stairs, stand while on the phone.  Make your rest and sleep a priority.  Yes, I’m well aware the rug won’t vacuum itself… yet, sometimes just curling up on the couch with your family to watch a movie is exactly what you need.  Try to find ways to wind down before bed free from the blue light of screens.

Simplify and prioritize.  Understand that you are one human and even though you want to, you can’t do all the things all the time.  Prioritize what matters.  Say no to what doesn’t and recognize that doing your best is what you can do well everyday.   

Try a digital detox.  Unplug from work and really try to limit your screen time a few times a day.  Some small changes can make a big difference.  Downtime, even when it’s sparing, isn’t really best spent on your phone or computer.  You know it and I know it.  It’s way too easy… but if you flip the coin and consider how could you spend that 5 minutes that would actually give your body some endorphins that make you feel good? A walk around the block, a cup of tea, organizing that darn junk drawer, some yoga stretches, whatever works for you (that’s not your phone).  

This one probably sounds ridiculous, celebrate and allow yourself some fun.  Make a plan to do something that gets you out of the drudgery of the day to day.  Something to look forward to.  It doesn’t have to be monumental like a week-long beach vacation in Fiji (although that sounds really nice right about now).  Sometimes it’s taking an extra long hot shower, planning coffee or a catchup call with a friend, reading a book, doing a jigsaw puzzle, making time to workout, plan a fancy dinner at home or out, book the trip or whatever it is that you will look forward to.  

Yes, it’s hard, but carving out some time, or even a small moment for a reset is one the kindest and nicest thing you can do for yourself.  And you deserve it!  Wishing you a great year ahead.